


When strangers meet

by MarjorieNescio



Category: Inglourious Basterds, The Sound of Music - Rodgers/Hammerstein/Lindsay & Crouse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:34:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25031773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarjorieNescio/pseuds/MarjorieNescio
Summary: A colonel looking for an abandoned fiancée meets a baroness.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4





	When strangers meet

After the excitement of the hunt colonel Landa enjoyed the elegance of Vienna. He had just attended a concert and the audience was dressed dashingly. Compared to scenes he had witnessed days ago, the contrast was striking. It amused Landa to think that in one place people were being dragged from their hiding places while in another place people worried about which cuff links to wear.

It was his nature to spot those who were hiding something. In the present setting it concerned the secrets of the unfaithful or hidden thoughts of boredom and dislike. He was in a playful mood and he teased some music lovers with the information they handed him by their words and gestures. There wasn't much fun in controlling people when the stakes were so low though. Perhaps he should leave? Sauntering toward an exit he heard someone talk about an engaged lady who had been dumped for a novice. A novice! How wonderful! The lady in question was said to be present at the concert and Landa felt like sniffing her out.

It was reasonable to assume the novice to have been young and very pretty, or she wouldn't have tempted another woman's fiancé. By contrast the lady must be middle aged, fat and ugly. Landa reasoned that she was wealthy too for why else had such a woman become engaged in the first place?

Landa moved from one wrinkled jewellery covered lady to another. He smiled charmingly, picked up fallen fans, glanced at ring-fingers and listened to the conversations going on. It never took him long to find out that he was on the wrong track.

Having seen a lot of crow's feet and double chins he took a pause when he spotted a lady who was Aryan from top to toe. She had an alabaster complexion, her hair was gorgeously blonde, her neck was long, she held her head high and her figure was exquisite. She was surrounded by admiring gentlemen. He smiled at her, but she didn't seem to notice. Someone tapped on his shoulder.

OoOoOoO

Baroness Schraeder had heard of the colonel's reputation. The one thing she disliked more than Nazis were fanatic Nazis. While the officer was distracted, she found a safe haven next to an old Austrian friend who happened to outrank the Standartenführer. For as long as it lasted the two of them pleasantly talked about painters.

´I'm sorry, I can't help but interfere Herr General, but I think the lady is right: no one plays with light like Vermeer.´

The general looked annoyed at first but one look at the colonel's SS uniform made him decide not to take offence at the interruption. He even felt obliged to comment the Reich's military successes. The baroness took her chance: ´If you gentlemen will excuse me.´

´Oh no ma'am, please don't leave. We soldiers need the company of ladies to remind us of civilization, isn't that so Herr General?´

The general agreed wholeheartedly.

´And we will not talk about military strategy ma'am,´ the colonel said with a smile, ´I heard a rumour and as an intelligence officer of the SS I need to verify whom it concerns.´

The general swallowed nervously. The baroness wondered whether perhaps he had ridiculed Hitler's moustache. The twinkle in the colonel's eye reminded her of her dear friend Max. Max had never reminded her of a predator though.

´Really sir,´ she said to the colonel, making sure she was wearing a playful expression, ´There is no shame in admitting that you feel like _gossiping_.´

The SS officer laughed. The general joined him.

´I plead guilty,´ the colonel said with a boyish smile. ´I have heard a _delightful_ gossip and I'm looking for the lady whom it concerns.´

´Ha!´ said the general.

´But let me introduce myself first. Hans Landa. At your service.´

The general introduced his lady friend and himself.

The colonel was suave but from the flicker in his eye when he learned that she was an aristocrat the baroness guessed that he was of low birth. It made him a dangerous man in more than one way.

The general asked the colonel what information he had on the lady, so he might help him to find her.

´She is common looking, wealthy and single, but… and this is what intrigues me: she used to be engaged.´

´Her fiancé died bravely on the battlefield?´ the general suggested.

´No he didn't.´

´She broke the engagement because he proved to be a _Jew_?´

´Nothing of the sort Herr General. You'll never guess it so I will tell you: she lost him to a novice! Ha!´

The baroness tilted her head and studied the broadly smiling colonel. The man looked from the general to her as if to invite them to laugh their heads off.

The general turned red and she quickly placed her hand on his upper arm to stop him from doing something stupidly masculine such as challenging the colonel to a duel.

´Isn't this funny?´ the German tried. ´Ha ha! How ugly does a woman have to be to lose her fiancé to a _nun_!´

As the colonel's laughter turned slightly hysterical, the baroness gestured toward the other side of the foyer.

´I think your wife needs your assistance Franz,´ she said.

OoOoOoO

The confidence of the aristocracy was something to admire, Landa told himself as he wiped away some merry tears. Baroness Schraeder had sent that old moron away just like that and what other reason could she have than to flirt with him? She was gorgeous. She made every lady present look like a peasant.

He chuckled.

´Being a woman myself I naturally feel for a lady who was abandoned,´ the baroness pleasantly said. ´I do see how amusing it may seem to others.´

´Gnädige Frau, please do not think that I don't feel for the lady. It is just such an outrageous tale. Had I read about it in a book than I would have thrown the volume aside.´

´Some things are best forgotten, I agree.´

´I hope the lady thinks so too,´ Landa said with a twinkle in his eye, ´But I will not speak of her again. My present company is far more enchanting than she can possible be.´

The baroness had a beautiful smile. She wore gloves. She was observant.

´No wedding band,´ she said.

´I for one am not sad for that,´ he said in a deep voice, eyeing her meaningly.

A waiter passed by and Landa took two glasses off his tray, offering one to the breathtaking woman in front of him. She thanked him with a nod.

´I used to be engaged though. My fiancé didn't die on the battle field.´

She took a sip of her wine.

´Can you guess what happened sir?´

Landa's smile froze.

´Good bye colonel.´

And with a nod she walked passed him. Landa needed a moment and when he turned around she had disappeared in the crowd.

´Ha!´

Landa was amused and charmed. He wouldn't leave her the last word though:´Your fiancé was a fool baroness. A FOOL!´


End file.
